As a pageant coach, one of the first things I ask a client is, “what are your expectations for this pageant?” Most of the time I am shocked to hear that they don’t expect to win. I’ll hear things like, “I want to do my best,” I want to make top 10,” “I just want to get on the stage in a swimsuit.” All of these are great goals and sound a little too politically correct. You might as well say, “I want world peace.”
My next step is to challenge this line of thinking. “Then why are you competing?” I’ll ask. As I dig deeper, I learn that they secretly want to win but are too afraid to verbalize it. Yes, they want to build confidence and develop life skills. Yes, they want to make new friends or challenge themselves. Some even do it to motivate themselves to be more healthy. But if they are totally honest with themselves, they really want to win.
The next question I will ask is, “What would happen if you actually won?” I usually get a confused stare in return. Although they may have thought about winning, they never thought beyond the crowning moment. We talk through how it would change their life. What would it require. Would it impact job or school. How would the family be impacted? You see, that’s the scary part. What if you won? Write down all the fears.
Plan to win!
After working through the “why” and “what” we work on a plan to win. We work on interview skills and modeling skills. More importantly, we work on the mental skills. If you don’t expect to win, why would you expect the judges to choose you? We work on visualization, just like an athlete. If they can’t imagine winning, it just won’t happen.
The next time you or your child competes, expect the win. Will it happen? Who knows? The point is to have high expectations. You can always adjust afterwards. Picture the crowning moment. Visualize the winning gown walk and being confident in interview. Expect to win the pageant!
For more on visualization and a winning mindset, check out my ebook, Crown Connection. It has an entire section on mental preparedness. It includes proven secrets I share about interview, stage work and wardrobe. Grab your copy today!